I’m currently on a comprehensive journey that I hope will lead me to finding out my ultimate meaning in life. Basically, I’m just living each day to its fullest potential in my own eyes. Since being on this journey, I’ve realized many things about myself: some negative and some positive. One of my flaws is harping on the negative things I see in myself instead of accentuating the positive ones. I let my imperfections become insecurities and drag my self esteem into the dirt.
I’ve always had issues “fitting in” with the people I THOUGHT I wanted to be my friends. I’ve never been slim, I’m tall for a female, I don’t have long pretty hair, I’m dark-skinned, I’m black: the list is endless. To put it simply, I never saw myself as good enough for anyone. Not to be their friend, their girlfriend, or anything else.
I’m in my early twenties now, and I’m seeing my sister and many of my friends and cousins, etc. blossoming into adulthood completely at ease with themselves. I’m comfortable enough with myself not to be jealous, but rather happy for them; however, at the same time I’m uncomfortable enough in myself to know that maybe I need to take that tote bag of my insecurities out of my closet and start working on them. While there may be nothing wrong with me the way I am, as long as I’m unhappy with things about myself and those things are weighing my self esteem down, I’ll never truly be happy and comfortable in my own skin.
My goal right now in my journey is to begin working on the things that I personally don’t like about myself. Rather than focusing what improvements other people THINK I need, I’m going to make alterations based on what I feel, want, and need. It’s going to be a journey all about me if you will. I want to love everything about myself and not just constantly focus the things that I do like and neglect the others.
Don’t allow your issues with yourself to hold you back. There will always be people who love and care about you regardless of how you look, sound, act, whatever. But at the end of the day, you can’t settle into being “comfortable” just because someone accepts you regardless. If you’re unhappy with traits about yourself, work on changing them so you can be as confident in yourself as possible. It’s only then that you’ll reach your greatest potential. Learn to love yourself the way you are, and if you find that the person you love needs improvement (which I’m sure you will because no one is perfect), then do what it takes to alter the things you see negatively.
Always remember that you’re perfect the way you are, but we could all be better versions of ourselves. Aim for perfection until you’re the perfect you. Learn to look past your insecurities so that you can see the happiness that lies just beyond.
Peace and Love,